LaughLines: It’s Not Easy Being Clean

Subscribe to this Blogger's RSS feed
Share

Matt and I are painting our bedroom. Of course, we’re doing it in mid-winter, which means sealed windows and paint fumes strong enough to choke a horse, but no matter. We’re determined to replace very tired-looking wallpaper, no matter how tired we get.

The process includes moving dressers and the bed around, so that means uncovering months – make that years – of dust bunnies, dirt, dead insects and hair balls. Yuck. It’s amazing what you find under a dresser that hasn’t moved since you moved in. Continue reading “LaughLines: It’s Not Easy Being Clean” »

LaughLines: Co-workers Are a Lot of Work

Subscribe to this Blogger's RSS feed
Share

I recently made a career change and for the first time in my professional life, I don’t have co-workers.

I’m working as a consultant, so at any given moment, you could say I technically have a few hundred co-workers, but they’re not the real thing. Continue reading “LaughLines: Co-workers Are a Lot of Work” »

LaughLines: The Sum of All Fears Is CRAZY!

Subscribe to this Blogger's RSS feed
Share

Does everyone have a phobia but me?

Our big dog is suddenly afraid of telephone poles, and as we quickly returned from our morning walk to the relatively safety of our pole-less driveway, I realized that unlike most people (and apparently, some dogs), I do not have irrational fears. Continue reading “LaughLines: The Sum of All Fears Is CRAZY!” »

Hot Husband! Sex With The Tin Man

Subscribe to this Blogger's RSS feed
Share

By Cate Drew
Laugh LinesMy husband Matt is a real hottie. Good looking, tall, broad-shouldered, gorgeous full head of hair. Wow.
No, I’m not the only one who thinks so: when he was 51, I entered him in a national mag’s Hottest Husband contest and he made the top 20 before losing to a 20-something plumber who moonlighted as a massage therapist (how can you top that combo??). Continue reading “Hot Husband! Sex With The Tin Man” »

LAUGHLINES: Power to the People – Please!

Subscribe to this Blogger's RSS feed
Share

This past weekend, the power went out (again) at our house, which meant firing up the generator and firing up everyone’s tempers.

It’s hard to be in a good mood when you’re restricted to one room with heat, and have to share said room with one husband (who alternated between surly and horny, don’t ask me why), two teenagers (they were just surly) and three dogs (they put on the most positive front during our ordeal, by the way). Continue reading “LAUGHLINES: Power to the People – Please!” »

LAUGHLINES: She’s Got the Wedding Bell Blues

Subscribe to this Blogger's RSS feed
Share

Matt and I went to a wedding over the weekend, and wow. What a romantic event. Made me ashamed of my wedding, back a million years ago.

This wedding was the kind you see in a movie. Less than 100 guests and an outdoor ceremony in a garden. The bride wore a slip of a dress (she’s a slip of a girl) and the groom was appropriately bashful and beaming. Continue reading “LAUGHLINES: She’s Got the Wedding Bell Blues” »

LAUGHLINES: Color Me Beautiful, but Gray

Subscribe to this Blogger's RSS feed
Share

Last night, Matt asked me about my next hair appointment. I thought he was going to complain (again) about the cost of my highlighting, but no – he instructed me to get the gray out.

Ouch. I have blonde highlights to camouflage the gray hair, but apparently it isn’t working. Continue reading “LAUGHLINES: Color Me Beautiful, but Gray” »

LAUGHLINES: The Joy(lessness) of Cooking

Subscribe to this Blogger's RSS feed
Share

I hate to cook and I don’t care who knows it.

I’ve tried to cook. I once cut a few dozen recipes out of women’s magazines, but I’ve yet to make even one. They’re too complicated, they have too many ingredients that I don’t have and don’t want to run out and buy, and frankly, I don’t have the time. I have better things to do, like sleep and — yes, eat.

I don’t have a Cuisinart or a steamer, or a set of professional knives. My oven is electric – no fancy-schmancy gas cooktop stoves for me. No subzero freezer, warming oven, or hanging brass pots that scream “I am a real cook!!”
I don’t have cookbooks, but if I did, I’d be using them to prop up the dresser in my bedroom that’s missing one caster. The kitchen canisters we got as a wedding present 20+ years ago are not in the kitchen filled with flour, sugar or recipes. They’re in the basement, filled with crayons, Legos, and marbles.

Sure, I watch “Top Chef” on cable occasionally, because it’s fun to watch people sling, toss, mash, bash, cube, Continue reading “LAUGHLINES: The Joy(lessness) of Cooking” »

LaughLines: Your Dogs Social Life

Subscribe to this Blogger's RSS feed
Share

Puppy Training Part II–Like some of us, Puppies take time to warm up to other dogs as well as people. Make sure you allow your dog to get comfortable with everyone in the house, give her time to learn scents and recognize everyone. Smothering your dog can hinder her social development. It’s important that you instruct guest to allow the dog to sniff around them and maintain a sense of calm while the pup gets comfortable with this new person.

Continue reading “LaughLines: Your Dogs Social Life” »

LaughLines: Spring Has Sprung – Pass the Calamine

Subscribe to this Blogger's RSS feed
Share

Every spring I vow it won’t happen — and every year, it does.

I feel the familiar twinge, then itch, then burning sensation. A few days later, there’s a lone blister that blossoms into Continue reading “LaughLines: Spring Has Sprung – Pass the Calamine” »

Articles